Feel Good or Eat Good

Why are so many feelings wrapped up in our eating patterns?  Call it emotional eating, comfort eating, weakness, or whatever.  The foods I love are foods that bring back feelings and memories of the past.  Comfort food.

As I struggle to regain my focus on eating healthy and losing weight, I find myself doing a bit of comfort eating.  A friend and I took her son to his grandmother’s in another East Tennessee city.  We also went back several days later to pick him up.  Both times we took a ride through her childhood memories and they reminded me so much of my own.  I was on a memory high.  On the way back both times, we stopped at an old style drive-in.  You know the kind . . . you drive up and they come to the car and take your order.  Or you can sit at one of the wood picnic tables.  The menu boards list what seems like 100 options, from breakfast biscuits to burgers, hot dogs, chicken, chili, and sides.  And then there are the ice cream options – cones, sundaes, floats, and milkshakes.

Memories from my childhood came back.  I always loved crinkle cut fries with lots of salt and ketchup.  I ordered the large size.  I asked the waitress what kind of milkshakes they had.  She rattled of the standard flavors and then kept going.  She said banana and my eyes got very big.  “With real bananas or just banana flavored?”  She responded, “Real bananas” and I did not have to hear anymore.  Mmmmmmm.  My mom used to make us banana milkshakes.

Emotions definitely come into play when you make choices about food.  I let the emotions control what I ate and didn’t think twice.  I can’t do that all the time or I need to find healthier alternatives that will satisfy that emotion.  This is my biggest challenge on this road to healthy eating.

What is your biggest struggle?

Here’s Your Sign . . .

There is something about keeping a blog that holds you responsible for what you say and do.  One does not really want one’s shortcomings or downfalls right out there for everyone to see, right?

Since September, I have not been eating healthy.  Mostly, I have been eating whatever the heck I wanted and as much as I wanted.  I have made some effort to get back on track but those efforts quickly fell by the wayside.  I maintained the weight for a while but could tell my body was changing.  I was eating more carbs so my stomach was growing larger where it had flattened out slightly.  Then, I wasn’t maintaining anymore because I was eating too much and the exercise was being canceled out by the number of calories I was eating.  Long story short . . . 17 pounds returned, making me unhappy and embarrassed.

It was easier not to come to my blog to try to write about weight loss because if I did, I had to face my failures.

So I didn’t.  I haven’t written in months.

Well, it’s time to face it.

I have gained back 17 pounds of the 52 pounds I lost.  And things have to change.

Have you ever received “a sign”?  You know . . . the sign you need to change something in your life?  Sometimes they are subtle and sometimes they just jump up and slap you in the face.


Last night, I was at work a little later and I was overly hungry.  I had eaten a Chick-fil-A sandwich at about 11:30 and had eaten nothing since then – almost 6 hours.  My stomach was growling as I talked to my boss on the phone.  I got off the phone and ordered dinner online at Outback so I could pick it up on the way home.  I ordered a wedge salad and a small filet with broccoli.  Again, overly hungry, I scanned the dessert menu and saw a carrot cake.  I added that to the order.  I left work, swung by the restaurant to pick up the order, and headed home.  It smelled soooooooo good.  My stomach was still growling away.

When I arrived at home, I took the salad out and began enjoying it.  Who doesn’t love a wedge salad?  I opened the larger container holding the steak.  Yum.  Where was the broccoli?  There were two smaller styrofoam containers so I checked them both.  The broccoli was in the first.  The other must be the carrot cake, right?  I opened it to look at it.  Inside were about 10 pieces of celery.  Celery.  CELERY!!!!!

My first reaction . . . no, make that my second reaction . . . was to call the restaurant and complain.  Then I thought about the situation for a bit.  Then I said some ugly words.  Then I thought some more.  I finally decided to take that celery as a sign that my time as a free eater is coming to an end.  Carrot cake is not a vegetable.
So I am here, confessing my embarrassment and stupidity but also trying to set myself right again.  I heard the celery talking and I am going to change my ways.  It will be hard and I’m not perfect so I am back to talk about my struggles and my successes. 

Ahhhhhh, that feels so much better.  Damn celery.

Serving Size . . . Really?

Ok, we all know that we need to pay attention to serving sizes, right?  Manufacturers are quite clever and frequently package their products in a way that might mislead the consumer into thinking they are eating one serving size when, in fact, they are eating more than that.

How many of you have ever gone into a gas station while on a trip, grabbed a drink and a snack bag of chips and headed along your merry way?  I think we all have at some time.  That snack bag of chips generally has multiple servings, usually at least 2, as a standard serving size of chips is only 1 ounce.

I recently stopped for gas and picked up a Sobe Lifewater.  Thankfully these are zero calories so it doesn't affect my calorie counting but the other nutritional info shows that there are 25 mg of sodium and 6 g of carbs per serving.  However, there are 2.5 servings per container.  So if you drink the 20 oz. bottle (who is really going to share or save the rest for later?) you will actually get 62.5 mg of sodium and 15 carbs.

I learned long ago that I needed to read the WHOLE label and campare labels between products.  I'm actually pretty good at doing that.  But this weekend, I got stupid, I guess.

I was at Earth Fare picking up a few things and saw some yummy looking cranberry orange muffin cookies that advertised "no eggs, trans fat, or dairy" and cholesterol free.  They were packaged individually, easy to grab and eat in the car on the way home since I was hungry and knew that would hold me over until I could get home and cook.  I flipped over the package, saw that it was 230 calories and decided that was pretty fair for so large a cookie.  Once in the car, I opened up the package and enjoyed the heck out of that cookie.  So yummy.

When I got home, I went to log what I had eaten, flipped over the package and noticed this:

Seriously???  One cookie is 2 servings?  So my tiny splurge to hold me over was a total of 460 calories, more than the entire dinner I was preparing!!!  Who would have thought that a cookie was anything other than 1 serving?  One serving, one cookie, right?

I felt a little betrayed, a little stupid, and a little angry.  So I decided to share my stupidity and lesson learned with you all as a cautionary tale.

Have you ever had anything like this trip you up?

Week One All Over Again

Success!  I was determined that this week would be the one where I got back on track and became a disciplined person again.  I was through with holidays, vacations, and laziness.  I planned to eat healthy, to stay within my calorie range, and to burn more calories than I took in.  I was also going back to getting at least 8 glasses of water in.  So far so good on all of that.  

 

The work week started well on Tuesday.  I logged my food and went to my classes.  The total calories taken in - 1731, burned - 2923, so I burned 1192 calories more than I took in.  I actually went to dinner with friends from dance that night at Ruby Tuesday and had steak, mashed potatoes, broccoli, and a beer.  Ruby Tuesday has new Fit and Trim options on their menu that are all under 700 calories.

Wednesday went well also.  It was Zumba day so I knew there would be a high calorie burn and I also had dance rehearsal for a performance.  Even so, I did not go nuts.  I was careful throughout the day and was even able to have two servings of parmesan crusted tilapia for dinner.  Total calories in - 1702, total burned - 3124, burning 1422 calories more than taken in.

Today is yoga day so I will have to stay on track.  While yoga is amazing for toning, health, flexibility, and strength, it does not burn a ton of calories.  It has been something on which I have had to adjust my thinking.  I am motivated by the fact that I see my body changing and I am so much stronger, so the calories burned are just a plus.  Today my meals have been:

• 
  
  Breakfast - Bagel Thin sandwich with Laughing Cow Light Cheese, 2 strips bacon, fresh spinach leaves, coffee and cream.  Total 309 calories.
• 
  
  Morning snack - Dole organic banana.  110 calories
• 
  
  Lunch - 2 Jennie-O Turkey burger patties, light american cheese, Arnold's Sandwich Thin, and edamame.  Total 590 calories which is a little high for lunch but I will have about 600 calories left for the day which is easily doable.

After only a few days, I can already tell a difference in the way I feel.  I think the key is the reduction of "white carbs".  White potatoes, white rice, white pasta, and bread are all my "drug" of choice.  I have not had hardly any bread except for my breakfast which is either multi-grain or whole wheat.  I have not had rice or pasta at all and the small serving of mashed potatoes with my steak was the exception.  I had to change my mindset last year when I started this process to get away from filling my plate with a protein, a starch, and a vegetable.  I now serve myself a protein and at least one or more green vegetables.  It works for me and on occasion, if I am craving pasta or rice, I do whole wheat pasta or brown rice, 1 serving only.

I really can tell a difference already and I know once again I can do this.  Stay with me!

You Are What You Think

I rode back from the beach this week and had a lot of time to think.  It was just me and my daughter, it was a long drive and there was a temporary lull in the conversation.  I was in my head, mentally beating myself up for finishing off the bread pudding the night before and eating 2 dozen baked oysters the prior afternoon.  

I looked down at the seatbelt and the bulge coming over the top of the lap belt.  I was kind of disgusted with myself.  I thought about the fact that I had taken a few weeks off from tracking my food, blogging about my weight loss, and over the last few days, I had taken off my Bodybugg so I could tan evenly.  I was on vacation!  Stupid choices. Why did I do that?  Great . . . now I felt FAT again.

As I thought about it, I decided that I was just a little bit crazy.  I have not gained back any weight since March or April.  I am still 50 pounds lighter than I was a year ago.  I am wearing the same size I have worn since May which is either an 18 or 20.  A year ago I wore a size 26. The dancing/exercise has allowed me to maintain my weight loss while I "vacationed" from eating healthy.

So what happened?  Two months ago, I was proud of the way I looked and how far I had come.  What was different now?

My thinking was the difference.  I was thinking the same way I thought last year so I felt the same way I felt then.  Our self image is not based on any type of reality at any given moment, it is mostly all about what we think.  It's the reason an anorexic teenage girl thinks she's fat.  It's the reason at 292 pounds I thought I wasn't THAT fat until a saw a couple of photos telling me otherwise.

It's amazing what our mind does to us.  When I start thinking I'm fat again, I visualize that, get frustrated, and eat poorly.  When I am eating healthy, I see myself getting smaller and I am proud of my appearance.  Mind Tricks.

The fact is, I'm still fat even though I have lost 50 pounds.  I weigh 242 pounds.  I have 80 - 90 pounds to lose still.  No matter what I see in my head, those are the facts.  Sitting and thinking about it doesn't change a thing . . . action does.

I will find the physical strength and the mental strength to lose the next 80 - 90 pounds I need to lose.  I don't know how long it will take and I am not in a hurry.  It's a process.  The first step was putting that Bodybugg back on last night.  The second step was logging back into Livestrong.com this morning, recalculating my calorie goals and logging all my food today.

The next step . . . changing my thinking.  That's a much harder thing to do so stay tuned!

Dance Your Hiney Off

It’s been a while since I discussed how things are going on the exercise front so I thought I would give an update on how things are going.  Here is my weekly schedule:

• Monday is Sizemology.  This is a one hour dance class and we alternate jazz and hip hop dances.  Average calories burned for the hour is 275.
• Tuesday is Sizemology Choreography.  This is a 4 week series of one hour dance classes and we learn an entire song over the series.  Average calories burned for the hour is 275.
• Wednesday is Zumba.  This is a one hour dance/fitness class combining Latin dance with aerobic moves.  Very fast paced and intense.  Average calories burned for the hour is 650.
• Thursday is Mool Mani Yoga.  A very relaxing but challenging form of yoga created by my instructor, Angie Collins.  She combines vinyasa yoga with reiki healing and meditation.  Average calories burned is 200 but there are body toning and flexibility elements that are not measurable.
• Friday is an off day.
• Saturday starts with Mool Mani Yoga at 10am and then Sizemology at noon.
• Sunday is Zumba again.

That’s a total of 7 hours per week, averaging 2525 calories burned each week
.
I have spent the last few months maintaining my 50 pound weight loss.  I am trying to get back on the weight loss wagon but until I get my butt in gear, the classes and my weekday calorie counting have allowed me to not gain.  Weekends are blowing it for me but my goal right now is to NOT gain and it’s working.

What do you do to make sure you don’t ruin your progress?

Recipe – Summer Squash Side Dish

My recent trip to the Farmer’s Market yielded some beautiful squash.  I bought yellow summer squash, zucchini, and Mediterranean squash.  I wanted to share one of my favorite easy, low calorie summer side dishes. You can also add some fresh mushrooms for additional flavor.


As always, I am a “dump” cook so these amounts are an estimate.  Have fun with it.

Summer Squash Side Dish


Ingredients
3 – 4 average size of any type of squash or a mixture of types, sliced into about 1/8 to 1/4 inch round slices
1/2 cup diced red onion
Non-stick cooking spray
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon pepper
1 teaspoon Beau Monde seasoning
A “shake” of Cajun seasoning such as Tony Chachere’s or Emeril’s


Instructions
Spray cooking spray in a large size skillet and heat over medium high heat.  Add the diced red onion and saute until soft.  Add the sliced squash and spray with more cooking spray.  Add seasonings and stir well.   Cook over medium high heat stirring frequently until the squash is soft and cooked through.


This dish will give you 2 large servings and each serving is about 50 calories.  It is a great side dish for fish, chicken, or beef.

Market Fresh Blackberries

Yesterday’s trip to the farmer’s market yielded a lot of photos and some amazing produce.  I got these blackberries while there and I do believe they are the largest blackberries I have ever seen and they are so sweet.  The one I am holding is not even the largest!  They were a great healthy breakfast this morning.

I also got some beautiful tomatoes that I will be using for a caprese salad later today.  For those that aren’t sure – a caprese salad consists of sliced tomatoes, sliced fresh mozzarella, fresh basil, and balsamic vinegar.  All you do is take a slice of tomato, lay it on the plate, lay on a slice of mozzarella, add the fresh basil and drizzle with balsamic vinegar.  So good.

I got some fresh corn, some beautiful green onions, and a few different types of squash.  One type of squash was interesting to me – Mediterranean squash.  It looks like a zucchini but is a much lighter green color.  In looking for recipes on Google, it appears you use it like any other summer squash like zucchini or yellow squash.

What kind of things do you gravitate to at your farmers market?

Okay, That’s Enough

After a week of careful planning and thoughtful choices, I let a little crazy creep in.  I spent the long weekend at my daughter’s in Atlanta and it felt like we did nothing but eat and eat and eat.  The food we ate was pretty healthy . . . it was the sweet stuff that was crazy.

I almost never eat sweets.  I eat a lot of fruit but I don’t really like candy and could do without cakes or pies or sweet stuff in general, though I do love good chocolate.  But during that long weekend, I went on a sugar binge – pies, ice cream, chocolate, just piles and piles of sugar.  When I returned home on Monday evening, I continued to indulge in the sweet stuff, things I never eat.  On Tuesday, same thing.  And Wednesday too.  I ate really healthy during the day but at some point daily, I ate sweets.

Every day, I struggled in the afternoon.  I was worn out.  Every evening, I went to bed early and every morning, I had a hard time getting out of bed.  I assumed I must be coming down with something.  My body just didn’t feel right.  I was sluggish and had a hard time keeping my eyes open every day around 2pm, even though I was sleeping at least 9 hours each night.  On Thursday afternoon, I really didn’t feel well and went home around 3pm, crawled in the bed and slept for an hour.  I went to yoga later, came home and got in the bed at 9:45pm and slept until 8am this morning!!!

I was catching up on my blog reading this morning and went to one of my favorite healthy living blogs Loser For Life.  Today’s post was all about her struggles with fighting off the sugar urge on vacation and after she returned home.  She talked about being tired.  A light bulb went on.  I was experiencing the sugar rush and the sugar crash.  And I had kept on feeding it.  My body was reacting to the sugar.  Stupid sugar!

So bear with me over the next few days as I detox and get that stuff out of my system.  Stupid sugar!

And On The Menu Today . . .

 . . . only healthy stuff.  Do you ever just get tired of hearing yourself whine?  That's where I was yesterday.  So after posting yesterday's thoughts, I decided to kick my butt in gear and get back to focusing on healthy, not just on calories.  I always feel better when I focus on health and not just on the weight.

Yesterday was pretty good although it was a little heavy on the carbs - blueberries and vanilla greek yogurt for breakfast, Kashi Lemongrass Coconut Chicken frozen dinner for lunch, wheat thins and hummus for a snack, a chocolate vitatop for another snack, and chicken/apple sausages on wheat buns with greek pasta salad for lunch.  I also had a KIND Coconut and Almond bar right before I went to dance class.  I ended the day at just over 1900 calories, a little higher than planned, about 150 calories over my goal.

After dance I stopped by the market to pick up some more healthy snacks for the week.  I ran across some buttermilk cheese that sounded interesting, picked out some pretty plums and apples and stocked up some hummus from my favorite local restaurant.  I really try to keep healthy snacks around that are easy to take with me to work so I can keep my regular meals smaller.

Today was also pretty healthy.  Breakfast was a canadian bacon and raw spinach on a sandwich thin and I added some of the buttermilk cheese.  Interesting flavor, kind of mild with a cheddar flavor.  For a morning snack I had raw broccoli and sliced cucumbers with hummus.  So yummy.  Lunch was organic turkey, raw spinach, buttermilk cheese and Dijonnaise on Ezekiel sesame bread.  I am generally not a sandwich eater but this was so good and very satisfying.  It's almost 3pm and I still have over 800 calories left for today.  I have my cooler that right now holds a KIND snack bar, a small cucumber salad, and some kale salad so a snack later before dance class should not throw me off my targets.  And dinner after dance class tonight should be ok because I am having sushi with the girls.


I feel better and I am not hungry.  There is something about eating healthy that just makes you feel good.

Back From The Edge

Last week was a little bit of a challenge.  I attended a week long work conference in St. Louis.  There was a lot of food over the week and it came frequently.  I don't think I over ate and I focused mostly on eating lots of veggies but I did eat desserts and other things I would not have eaten otherwise. 

The stress level was kind of high.  It was a long week . . . meetings, training attended and trainings led, performances (I was Oprah), awards, top executive visitor . . . you get the picture.  By Thursday, I was so ready to go home.

Our flight out of St. Louis was delayed by an hour.  We knew we were going to cut our connection very, very close so we decided to eat at the airport before we flew out.  I shared a pizza with another friend.  Finally, we took off and headed for Atlanta.

Our flights in Atlanta were the last flights of the day.  My flight was at 10:50pm and the other girls' was at 10:52pm.  We knew that if we missed our connection, we would be stuck for the night.  Our plane arrived in Atlanta and we were not able to pull into the gate for about 10 minutes.  As we exited the plane, we found we were on concourse A and had to go to concourse D.  We ran, took the train, and ran some more.  We arrived at our gates at 10:45 and the doors were closed.  They would NOT let us on.  Seriously???? But they did put our luggage on the plane.  Ummmm, how thoughtful of them.  We would be staying in Atlanta for the night but our luggage would make it home.

I rented the other girls a car to drive home to Alabama and called my daughter, who now lives in Atlanta, to come pick me up.  She had been wishing all night that I would miss the connection so I could stay with her.  I'm not sure she considered what I would smell like the next day since I had no clothes or toothbrush or clean underwear but at least she could take care of me.  We arrived at her apartment at 1:30am.

A friend drove to Atlanta on Friday to bring me home.  Of course, we all had dinner before leaving at a wonderful restaurant in Old Roswell.  It was amazing and we took off for Knoxville around 10pm.  We were stuck in traffic outside Chattanooga for one hour and finally arrived at the Knoxville airport to pick up my car around 2am on Saturday. 

However, I couldn't get out of the parking lot.  There was only one booth open and it had a sign on the window that said "back in 20 minutes".  Ummmmm, really?  I waited.  I moved the cones from the automated lanes and tried to pay but the machines were broken.  I wondered when I had pissed off Karma?

Finally, after 25 minutes, I called information on my cell phone and got the number for airport security.  They went and found the booth worker.  He came barrelling across a median on a golf cart, obviously angry.  He unlocked the door, went into the booth and slammed the door.  He couldn't get the window open which made him MORE angry.  Finally, he got it open.  Lucky for me! The officer was trying to carry on a conversation with him and "dude" was so rude.  He never apologized or even spoke to me.  RUDE!  It was 3am when I got home, ready to just fall into bed.

I remembered as I walked in and the temperature was the same as outside that I needed to call the air conditioner repairman.  I went into my kitchen to set my purse down and there was about an inch of water on the floor and towels were floating on top of it.  My water/ice line for the refridgerator had sprung a very small leak and my son had put towels down to soak it up.  Of course that was about 12 hours before when he left for work and my kitchen was now flooded.  As I held back tears, I picked up the towels and put them in the sink.  I went to get more towels and soaked up some more water.  I went to the sink with an armload of towels again, slipped on the wet floor and went down.

I cannot repeat here the words that came out of my mouth.  Lots of inappropriate words.  I got the mess cleaned up and turned the water off under the sink.  I found 3 fans and pointed them all at my bed.  I turned them on "high" and fell into the bed.  Ahhhhhhh, sleep.

It would be a lie if I said I didn't eat like crazy that weekend.  I spend most of Saturday picking up my luggage from the airport, calling repairmen and setting up appointments and just laying on my behind.  And eating.  And eating.  And eating.

Monday was another day.  Back to work and back to healthy eating.  I jumped right back into my routine and ended the day having consumed 1541 calories and burned 2100 calories.  I felt in control again and it felt good.  Today has been good too.

I think I can do this.

Stupid, Stupid, Stupid

After a few weeks of eating slightly over my calories, I have had a really good week.  I write it all down, the good, the bad, and the ugly.  Then today, I did something stupid, stupid, stupid.  I hate it when that happens.

It was a crazy day at work.  We have a huge conference next week and all the last minute prep was overwhelming.  It was stressful but I was handling it with humor and a list.  I forgot to bring my lunch so I ran to pick up some KFC grilled chicken.  I was well within my calorie limit with this choice and glad that I had more than enough calories left over for dinner.  Today is a day that I don't exercise so I am always pretty careful about my food on those days.

Later a friend called and said she was going to run by Sonic and pick up her lunch and a chocolate milkshake.  Oooooooohhhhhhh, milkshake!  I asked her to bring me a small chocolate milkshake.  Yum.

She walked in with the milkshake and I tasted it.  SO good but . . . what is that taste?  This is not just chocolate.  She tasted it.  Chocolate peanut butter.  Wow.  Even better.  I slurped that yummy concoction down and finished some more conference prep. 

Later I pulled up my Daily Plate on Livestrong.com to record my decadent treat.  WHAT THA??????????????  A small chocolate peanut butter milkshake from Sonic is 678 freakin' calories!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh my goodness.  I typed it into my Daily Plate and I have one, yes one, calorie left for dinner.  Stupid, stupid, stupid.

The moral of the story . . . take the time to look it up before you decide to eat it.

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Trying Yoga

My dance classes are working and I love them.  I like them so much that I was ready to add some additional classes.  I do Sizemology Dance on Mondays and Saturdays, Zumba on Wednesdays and Choreography on Thursdays.  I needed something for Tuesdays when some of my friends in Sizemology  mentioned a yoga class they were interested in attending. 

First of all, my past experiences with yoga have not been positive.  In fact, I kind of hated it.  Again, I am not a particularly “still” person and, although I was raised in a sort of New Age environment, I don’t generally respond to the New Age type of thought.  But my friends explained that this was different, this teacher was different.  So I decided to try it. 

I was pleasantly surprised.  I am pretty flexible and always have been, even for a fat girl, so the poses were challenging but not painful.  The instructor, Angie, told us to trust our body and let it guide us.  Angie is a Reiki practitioner and throughout the hour, she would walk through the class and gently touch the students, sometimes to slightly adjust the pose.  I am never comfortable with strangers touching me but Angie’s touch was comforting.


Angie’s melodic, soft voice was soothing.  She talked throughout the whole class, sometimes explaining how to do a pose, sometimes talking about energy and healing and spirituality.  Again, I am not one that normally responds to this type of thing but there was something about Angie’s voice, her excitement, the flow of her words that was so relaxing, even as I was sweating through a pose. 

Before I knew it, the hour was over.  I felt amazingly worn out, powerful and relaxed at the same time.  I went home that night and bought a class card.  And I went back this Tuesday.  I will be adding the Saturday class this week.

So now I am dancing four hours a week and doing yoga two hours each week.  I feel like I am getting into a very well rounded exercise routine that works on all parts of my body.  But the best thing about doing all that is that I get so much more than the calorie burn.  I love dancing and am learning that I love this type of yoga.  And it makes me a happier person.   That goes way beyond the weight loss.

Being Mindful

Never have I had so intimate a relationship with a strawberry as I had on Saturday night.  No, I have not irevocably lost my senses nor have I moved over to fruit for emotional support.

I was invited by a friend to attend a seminar by a local life coach which was centered around the topic of the Zen practice of mindful eating.  The woman had lost over 350 pounds after gastric bypass and kept it off for many years so I was interested to hear what she had to say.  I am not a meditative or particularly "still" kind of person but I am open-minded.  So off I went to the seminar.

I have been aware of mindful eating as a part of my weight loss process but I guess I practice my own version.  I try to slow down, chew food more, and recognize the taste of the food and appreciate it more than when I used to just shovel it in. It has allowed me to savor and enjoy food more and it allows me to eat less and be satisfied.

During the seminar, the life coach did an exercise in mindful eating using strawberries.  First she had us select a berry.  Then she turned the lights down and asked us to close our eyes.  She led a guided meditation to allow us to center ourselves.  Then she spoke very slowly and had us examine the berry, noticing it's texture, it's color, the shape, the seeds, the smell.  She asked us to think about how the berry got there, who picked it, the people who had been in contact with that berry.  Then she told us to take a small bite.  Notice the flavor, the sweetness, the sourness, the texture.

Okay, I know I shouldn't be like this but I do NOT have the time to take 5 minutes to eat a strawberry.  Nor do I want to take that much time to eat anything.  I know it was just an exercise and it had an impact on many in the room.  They enjoyed the berry more than they have when eating strawberries in the past.  They appreciated all the effort that brought the berry to us and the beauty of the fruit.  I did not have that epiphany.  I am just not capable of being that spiritual about my food.

I do believe in appreciating your food and the person that prepared it, slowing down, savoring it, and enjoying what you eat.  And I will continue to listen to other's different thoughts on how to eat healthier and how to become a better person. 

But I am trying to change my relationship with food and really do NOT need to love it more than I already do.  I am trying to teach myself that food is not about the feeling.  That it is needed to help me stay alive and to nourish my body but food does not have to have emotional attachment. It will be okay if something does NOT taste amazing.  I also don't have to eat it if it does taste amazing because it will not change my life.

That is my version of mindful eating right now.

Yummy Recipe - Tropical Chicken Fingers

I came up with this recipe on the fly tonight and it was so good I wanted to share.  It's nothing new or even creative but it was really good.  The mango coconut sauce is pre-made in a bottle.  It is made by Tropical Pepper Company.  I get it at Earth Fare but I know you can find it in a lot of grocery stores.  I had the chicken and sauce with some grilled asparagus and it totaled under 400 calories but I had only 3 chicken fingers instead of a full serving of 4.  If you have 4 chicken fingers and 3 tablespoons of sauce it is a total of 431 calories per serving.  Enjoy.

Tropical Chicken Fingers with Mango Coconut Sauce

• 1 lb Chicken Breast (boneless,skinless)
• 1 egg
• 1 cup Panko Japanese Style Bread Crumb
• Non stick Cooking Spray
• 1 whole lemon, cut in half
• 6 tbsp Mango Coconut Pepper Sauce
• 1/2 tsp Salt
• 1/4 tsp Garlic Powder

Directions

Spray skillet with cooking spray and heat over medium high heat. Use pre-cut chicken strips or trim chicken into 8 strips. Break egg into a flat bottomed dish and add salt and garlic. Mix well with a wisk. Dip chicken strips into egg and then roll in panko crumbs, coating the chicken well. Place the chicken in the heated skillet and spray with a little more cooking spray. Turn chicken once browned. Cook thoroughly. Squeeze lemon juice on chicken and place on plate. Serving is 4 chicken fingers with 3 tablespoons of sauce on the side.

This Too Will Pass

It’s been a tough week.   I never really thought I was an emotional eater until now.  In the past, I did not react to stress by going to food.  At least not that I was aware.  I tended to not really think about food when stress came around.  I don’t really have a lot of stress in my life on a regular basis so maybe I just didn’t know.

This week was stressful.  And I wanted to eat all kinds of things that were bad for me.  I wanted a McDonald’s hamburger and fries.  I don’t really even like McDonald’s except for their french fries.  I wanted pizza.  I wanted a foot long hot dog from a local drive-in in a combo with krinkle cut fries with lots of salt and ketchup.  And a milk shake.  And I ate it all over the course of the week.

I don’t really even like fast food.  I have not really missed it at all during the last 8 months.  But in a reaction to the stress, I wanted all that stuff.  I wrote it all down too in my on-line tracker, every day and all of it.  It was a lot of calories every day and I didn’t burn much more than what I took in each day but I did burn more.  The tracking and the lack of calories burned gave me a wake up call.  It had to stop.  And hi, my name is Tere and I am an Emotional Eater.

It made me look at what I was doing and made me realize it has to stop.  I have lost a lot of weight and gained so much more over the last 8 months.  It really has not been hard until this week.  I ate more than one serving of everything.  I ate things I didn’t really love.  All because I was stressed. 

The stress will go away but the weight gained (or not lost) will be here to remind me that I cannot do that.  The trips I have made to the bathroom have also reminded me!  Ugh!

Like I said, this was a tough week but I will not self-destruct.  I have done some self-reflection and learned something.  The stress will pass on by eventually and it is not in my control.  But what I put in my mouth is in my control. 

Favorite Recipe – Szechuan Shrimp

I love recipes from Cooking Light.  You can go to Cooking Light’s website and my favorite section 5 Ingredient Recipes.  I have found so many healthy, easy and quick recipes that have helped me lose weight.  I also own several of their cookbooks.  I love that they include all the nutritional information with every recipe.

Please enjoy one of my favorites then visit their site and find more.  And NO, I do not work for Cooking Light nor do I receive anything for endorsing them.  I just like them people!

By the way, I usually add Chinese pea pods to this when I add the shrimp.  It adds very few calories but gets some green veggies in and tastes great.

Szechuan Shrimp

Prep Time: 2 minutes
Cook Time: 7 minutes
Yield: 4 servings (serving size: 1 cup)

Ingredients

• Cooking spray
• 1 1/2  pounds  peeled and deveined large shrimp
• 3/4  teaspoon  crushed red pepper
• 1/2  cup  light sesame-ginger dressing (such as Newman's Own)
• 4  green onions, cut into 1-inch pieces
• 2  tablespoons  lightly salted toasted soy nuts, coarsely chopped

Preparation

1. Heat a large nonstick skillet over medium-high heat; coat with cooking spray. Coat shrimp with cooking spray; add shrimp and red pepper to pan. Stir-fry 2 minutes. Add dressing and onions. Cook 3 minutes or until shrimp are done, stirring constantly. Sprinkle evenly with soy nuts; serve immediately.

Nutritional Information

Calories: 190 (18% from fat)

Fat: 4g (sat 0.6g,mono 0.3g,poly 0.6g)

Protein: 29.5g

Carbohydrate: 7.9g

Fiber: 1.4g

Cholesterol: 252mg

Iron: 4.4mg

Sodium: 708mg

Calcium: 72mg

From Cooking Light Fresh Food Fast, Oxmoor House, APRIL 2009

Meal Tracking 3/16/2010

Today was a busy day and I love being back to tracking my food.  I had enough calories left over for dinner to have some yummy Swedish Meatballs with sauce over egg noodles.  I love that I can have just about anything I want as long as I have just one serving.  And I still have 288 calories left today.

March 16th, 2010

Meal

Item Brand

Item Name

Your Servings

Calories

breakfast breakfast

Laughing Cow Thomas

Light Swiss Cheese Bagel Thins

1.00  1.00

35 110

breakfast

Oscar Mayer

Pre-cooked Bacon Slices

1.00

70

breakfast

Raw Spinach

1.00

7

breakfast

Starbucks

Venti Skinny Cinnamon Dolce Latte

1.00

160

lunch

Kashi

Mayan Harvest Bake

1.00

340

lunch

Jello

Mousse Temptations - Dark Chocolate Decadence

1.00

60

lunch

Navel Orange

1.00

64

afternoon snack

Back to Nature

Cranberry Pecan Granola

0.50

100

afternoon snack

Chobani

Nonfat Plain Yogurt

1.00

100

afternoon snack

Truvia

1.00

0

dinner

Prepared Ikea Cream Sauce

0.25

64

dinner

IKEA

Swedish Meatballs

1.00

210

dinner

Great Value

Wide Egg Noodles

1.00

220

Totals

Calories

1,539.50

Back To The Real World

I have been on vacation.  It was a vacation from life, vacation from work and a vacation from my diet.  My daughter and her friends were on spring break from their various colleges so we planned a girls trip to the beach with moms and daughters.  Now I am back from my very relaxing week and headed back to the the real world. 

For the most part I was careful on my vacation when it came to eating.  I was thoughtful about what I ate but I did not restrict myself.  I was at the beach so it was easy to do seafood.  I was the cook all week so I was able to control what I ate and how it was prepared.  I used a lot of Cooking Light recipes that everyone could enjoy and they all loved the food I made.  The few times we ate out, I passed up the Cheeseburger in Paradise and went for the grilled fish with steamed veggies.  I ate steamed shrimp but also enjoyed baked oysters.  I stepped out of bounds on occasion but it was a conscious choice.  I ate dessert and I drank some pina coladas and had a few beers and enjoyed some chips and dip.  

But the difference during this trip was I made the dessert and only made enough for one day rather than every day.  I had a few chips and some dip rather than a bag of chips and a container of dip.  I had one pina colada instead of the whole blender full.  I shared an order of fries rather than getting my own.  I brought my hula hoops and hooped on the beach.  We went for a walk.  I made an effort to stay moving rather than just sitting in a beach chair or on the couch.

But I will not be getting on the scales for a couple of weeks.  I don’t feel like I gained, more likely I maintained.  But because I reached a milestone of 50 pounds the week before I left for vacation, I don’t want to get wrapped up in the number on the scale or the inevitable guilt that might result.  I don’t do guilt and I don’t need it affecting my progress.  The next time I weigh, it will be a lower number than the last time.

Tomorrow I will be back to food tracking and wearing the bodybugg and attending dance classes and moving my butt more.  I am excited to be back to my routine.  I am thankful for the time I had with my daughter and her friends and my friends.  But I love my routine of healthy choices and focused effort to make changes in my life.  I really don’t want go back to my old way of living.  I like things the way they are now.  I have learned so much and have come so far.  And I have a really long way to go so I know I can take a vacation and come right back and stay on track.

It was a good week.

Recipe: Pesto, Spinach, Tomato, and Goat Cheese Pizza

I am not a big fan of traditional pizzas.  But since I am trying to eat healthy and get a wider variety of ingredients into my diet, I have tried a lot of things that I never really thought about before.  

I knew I loved spinach just about any way you fix it and I knew that a little goat cheese  will go a long way to adding flavor without a lot of calories.  So when my daughter made a yummy tomato and goat cheese pizza from a Cooking Light recipe I thought I would start experimenting and try some additional ingredients.   

The pizza recipe below is what I came up with.  It uses some prepared ingredients, some fresh and it makes a pizza with 6 slices at 221 calories per slice. 

 

 

Ingredients

• 1 100% Whole Wheat Pizza Crust by Boboli
• 2 tbsp Pesto from the grocery
• 2 oz Fresh Raw Spinach
• 1 medium size Roma Tomato, sliced
• 2 4/5 oz Alloutte crumbled goat cheese
• 2 oz Asiago Cheese or Parmesan, shredded

Directions

Spread pesto on pre-made pizza crust. Layer on spinach then add sliced roma tomato. Top with goat cheese and sprinkle with asiago cheese.
Bake at 450 degrees for about 15 minutes.

This pizza is pretty filling and you get a lot of veggies in.  You could add diced chicken or chopped artichokes, or replace the Roma tomato with chopped sun-dried tomatoes.  Be creative and make it your own.